The Art of Asking Questions Elevating Leadership in the AI Era with Atiba de Souza

In the fast-paced world of entrepreneurship, building a high-performing team can be the difference between stagnation and success. This episode of Tech Diva Biz Talks welcomes Atiba de Souza, CEO, strategist, and self-proclaimed "business ninja," who shares his insights on transforming sluggish teams into unstoppable forces.

Atiba reveals the common pitfalls that trap business owners:

• The "superhero syndrome" that keeps leaders stuck in day-to-day operations
• The misconception that constant availability equals effective leadership
• How unintentionally positioning team members as "villains" hinders growth

Learn why many entrepreneurs unknowingly build cages around themselves and discover the key to unlocking true business freedom.

The Mindset Shift: From Hero to Guide

Atiba introduces a powerful paradigm shift for leaders:

• Why being the "hero" of your business is holding you back
• The importance of embracing the role of guide or coach
• How this shift transforms team dynamics and performance

"You're the Mr. Miyagi. That's the seat we do not sit in as small business owners. But that's the mental shift that has to happen."

Discover why the quality of your questions determines the quality of your leadership:

• The impact of replacing accusatory questions with curious inquiry
• How to use AI tools to improve your questioning skills
• Real-world examples of how better questions lead to stronger teams

Visit thedelegationtrap.com to access Atiba's book and exclusive bonuses designed to revolutionize your approach to leadership and team building.

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Transcript

[00:00:00 - 00:01:02]
Welcome to Tech Diva Biz Talks, where we tune in, dive deep, and level up. I'm your host, Audrey Wiggins, AKA the Tech Diva, brand strategist, marketing mind, and your guide through the ups and downs of entrepreneurship. Let's talk tech. Welcome, everyone, to Tech Diva Biz Talks. We're cutting through the noise and getting real about what it takes to build a powerhouse team that doesn't just show up, but shows out. Joining us is Atiba de Souza, the CEO, strategist known as business ninja, and team transformation guru. He's the secret weapon behind companies that go from sluggish to unstoppable. And he's here to share how leaders can ditch the fluff, fix the funk, and finally level up their teams. With a new book on the horizon and tech forward strategies, he actually moved the needle. Atiba's insights are straight fired. Welcome, Atiba, to Tech Diva Biz Talks.

[00:01:02 - 00:01:05]
Audrey, thank you so much. And it's so good to be back.

[00:01:05 - 00:01:06]
Yes.

[00:01:07 - 00:01:07]
Again.

[00:01:08 - 00:01:13]
Yeah, this is. This is cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right.

[00:01:13 - 00:01:27]
Yeah. Well, and if I could share this, too, with everyone. Part of the reason why I'm so excited to be back is because when I was here the last time, I was in the throes of actually working out and testing a lot of what we're about to talk about today.

[00:01:30 - 00:01:32]
Yes. Okay.

[00:01:32 - 00:01:41]
We know it works. We've chat. We've used it with a bunch of people. We know it's great. And it has gotten me so much freedom in business.

[00:01:42 - 00:01:45]
All right. Your Superman powers are in action.

[00:01:46 - 00:01:46]
Yes.

[00:01:47 - 00:02:16]
That is awesome. Yeah. So I'm excited, too. So you bring the energy and you're going to bring the, you know, bring the vibe and the. In the. And the real talk with us. You know that. Absolutely Asian. Yeah, yeah. The knowledge and expertise. We like that. So we're going to talk tap, we're going to talk team and transformation. So we're going to do that. Atiba, on the other side of our message. But before we do that, if you can share one or two personal fun facts with the tech divination.

[00:02:16 - 00:02:34]
Okay, so two fun facts about me is, number one, I still believe I have one of the largest Superman hat collections and in the world with over 200 hats. And. And I am about to move halfway around the world to Southeast Asia.

[00:02:34 - 00:02:39]
What? Southeast Asia? What is going on? Are you going to take the hat collection?

[00:02:40 - 00:02:54]
And so this is part of why I've had to liquidate some of the hat collection, because I can't take it all with Me, I wish I could. I've been trying to figure it out. I actually have an entire suitcase full of hats right now.

[00:02:54 - 00:02:59]
That's crazy. But set up an Etsy store or something. You know, let's.

[00:03:00 - 00:03:03]
Yes, I gotta, I gotta do something with.

[00:03:03 - 00:03:10]
Auction them or whatever. Yeah, that's fine. I think people would, would probably. There's probably some collectors out there too.

[00:03:11 - 00:03:11]
Yes, absolutely.

[00:03:12 - 00:03:18]
A nice, fun transition. So when is the move taking place? I know we're off, you know. Well, we're still talking about, oh, this is fun.

[00:03:19 - 00:03:32]
In October. So we'll be moving in October 20, 2025. It's something my wife and I said seven years ago. We started planning for October 2025 to move out of the country. And so we're just executing on the plan that we have set forth for the last seven years.

[00:03:33 - 00:03:40]
Wow. You know, and that's the beauty of being entrepreneur. Is your wife an entrepreneur or does she is. Okay.

[00:03:40 - 00:03:41]
Yeah.

[00:03:41 - 00:03:52]
That's the beauty of entrepreneurship. You just, you know, pack up your computer. It is next spot. You know, you don't do a, you don't have a, you know, a brick and mortar type business.

[00:03:52 - 00:04:24]
Your service, it is. And so many of us are still afraid to do it because there's so much that we feel like we may end up giving up when we do with our teams. Right. And it becomes a scary thing, like, well, are they still going to be able to perform? Right. Especially if you had a US based team or a localized team and you're feeling like, well, how's that going to work? And we so many times as business owners feel like we have to be in it for it to work.

[00:04:25 - 00:04:26]
Yes, yes.

[00:04:26 - 00:04:44]
Right. And that's why I wrote the book. Okay. And so, yes, my move and everything else is living proof of why I wrote the book and why this stuff in this book and the framework works so well. Wow.

[00:04:45 - 00:05:15]
I'm thrilled. That's all I can say. I'm so excited for you. You know, I've been, I've been trying to get just on the other side of the continental USA and come on, it's been what? Oh, gosh, I think it's going on 20 years that I had made that, that first, you know, that first little, you know, mental shift that I was going to do it and you know, and crawled back and that's crazy. And you're going halfway around the world. That is, that, that's awesome. That's. What, what country in particular? I don't know if you.

[00:05:15 - 00:05:36]
So, yeah, no, I haven't said It. But our base is going to be in the Philippines. Okay. And, you know, part of it is we want to travel and see all of Southeast Asia, so we'll have that base there. I mean, we get there end of October and November 15th, we're going to Thailand, you know, and. And so that's like. We won't be still for long.

[00:05:37 - 00:05:37]
Yeah. Yeah.

[00:05:38 - 00:05:43]
Because we want to go see the world and experience the world.

[00:05:43 - 00:05:57]
Yes. Yes. I love that. Yes. It is so much more than, you know, our little. Our little corner of the world, wherever we. Right now. Yeah. So, I mean, we can end the show just on that. That's the show. That's the show right there.

[00:05:57 - 00:05:58]
It is.

[00:05:58 - 00:07:24]
My goodness. Okay, so. So we'll be right back and we're gonna really talk this tech and get going on with Atiba D' Souza in a moment. Did you know 99% of people check their email every day, up to 20 times a day. It's the first thing people do online, even before looking at social media or other news. But viewers retain only 10% of what they read. Adding video to your email, their retention skyrockets to 95%. Video plus email equals success. It's time. The future of email is here. Goodbye, email. Hello, video email. Ready to wide the wave. Visit altogether popfusion.com welcome back, Atiba and tech divination. So on the other. The other side, you were telling us about this, this great, this humongous move, but oh, my gosh. So in the meantime, we' going to wind us back to leadership and the things that you. You have going on. So let's just pop it off with leadership and team performance. So you talk about zombie teams and flatline revenues. What are the. The biggest signs that a CEO's team is in trouble? Even if everything might look good on.

[00:07:24 - 00:08:22]
The surface, yeah, it. It happens in often one out of two ways for most of us. So it's number one. What are you thinking about before you go to bed at night? What's keeping you up? Worrying. That's on one side. And here's the other side. The other side is that when you wake up, there's so much to do because there are so many questions to answer that you spend most of your entire morning, if not your entire day, answering questions from your team and assisting your team and doing things for your team and with your team. And then they go home and you start to do your work. It's not at all the way it's supposed to be. However, it's the lie that we fed ourselves. It's the lie that other business owners have fed us. And it is the lie, at least one of them, that has caused us to build this cage around us that we call a business. Yeah, you're sitting inside of a birdcage.

[00:08:22 - 00:08:23]
That's crazy.

[00:08:23 - 00:09:10]
Okay? And you built it. That's the crazy thing. We build it for ourselves. But the beauty of the fact that we built it for ourselves, Audrey, is. And. And this is the scene on the front of my book is a man, and it's supposed to represent a human, really, sitting inside of a birdcage with a key. And so you're trapped inside, and you have the key. And so that's what I'm here to unlock. I'm here to help you unlock the fact that you have the key. Here's the key so that you can stick it in the door. Turn that sucker. And yeah, maybe you do want to move around the world like me. Come do it. Or maybe you just want to go take a month off. Go do it. Most of us can't take a month off, and our business is better when we come back than when we left.

[00:09:10 - 00:09:11]
And why is that?

[00:09:11 - 00:09:26]
Simply put. And so many people love to rail against this, but if you're honest with yourself, you'll realize it's so very true, even though you've never admitted it. It's superhero syndrome. We are the superheroes in our business.

[00:09:27 - 00:09:55]
Yeah. Yeah, like that. So this is leading up to the next question about mindset. Oh, my gosh. Mindset and strategy. And talked about in the introduction how you're. You're called, like, the business ninja. All right. In on building your own team guru. So what's that first shift, then a leader must make in their mindset before they can truly transform their team.

[00:09:55 - 00:11:21]
That first shift, y'all. It really comes down to you being able to honestly look at yourself in the mirror and be. And say, look, I do get a high when I solve a problem. I do get a high when I'm needed. I do get a high when it works out, and I had something to do with it. Right? And that's something that we have to admit to ourselves. Because, you see, until we admit that to ourselves, we live in this world where we also wonder why they can't do it. But the moment we start to admit that to ourselves, Audrey. And we start to say, you know what? That is me. I do have this superhero complex. I see it in myself. That's that first moment when we start to then say, okay, how do I get rid of that and is that hurting my team? Which the answer is always yes. Is it hurting my team? And what does the team actually need? Do they need me to be a superhero? You see, because this. Let's go to the oldest structure in human history, and it's the story that's the oldest communication structure in history, and it's the one that works the most effectively. In a story, you have a hero, you have a villain. You know what? You also have in every single story? A guide. Yeah. And so if you have a hero, you have a villain and you have a guide. And somebody has to play all of those parts. Who are you in your business?

[00:11:21 - 00:11:23]
Break it down. Atiba.

[00:11:23 - 00:11:55]
Okay. And so when you sit in that hero seat, then who is your staff? Who is your employee? Are they the villain or they the guide? Well, they're not the guide because they don't guide you. And so therefore you automatically make them the villain. Then you wonder why it's not working out. You see? But that's why we have to realize that we love being that hero. Because when we admit that and then we understand communication and understand. Because that's what delegation is all about. It's about communication. Right?

[00:11:56 - 00:11:56]
Yes.

[00:11:57 - 00:12:13]
And if we understand that, then we can say, okay, so if I'm not the hero and clearly I can't be the villain, it's my business, then what's my role? You're the guide. You're the Mr. Miyagi.

[00:12:14 - 00:12:15]
That's powerful.

[00:12:15 - 00:12:40]
And you see, that's the seat we do not sit in as small business owners. But that's the mental shift that has to happen. You've got to become the guide. Because the moment you become the guide, what ends up happening is you realize, you realize your role is to guide and you guide by coaching, not by telling and dictating.

[00:12:41 - 00:13:21]
Okay, okay, so that sounds like. And you just, you just messing up my whole little question thing here. So I was going to talk, ask you about systems, we might get to it, I don't know. But this guide thing. So one of the questions that I was going to cover is like the super connector power. So this, it kind of is leaning into, to that direction. As a self proclaimed super connector, the superhero thing that you're complex, you're talking about how do we fix those relationships, the internal, external, how do they play a role in the high performing teams and business growth? Because that's what we're doing. Rafted business growth.

[00:13:22 - 00:13:38]
Yes, absolutely. And so here's, here's. And you brought up super connector and people do call Me, a super connector. And I have what people say is a unique ability to connect people to each other. Right. But what it really is, is I'm a good guide.

[00:13:38 - 00:13:39]
Okay?

[00:13:39 - 00:14:46]
And so I meet Audrey, and I get to know Audrey, and I listen and I hear things, and I hear and I ask questions. And in asking questions, I learn things, and I learned some of Audrey's pain points. I learned what Audrey's fantastic. What she's awesome at, what she loves, what she's passionate about. Then I go over here, and I meet Peter, and I listen and I hear things, and I ask questions. And then listening to Peter, I realize, hey, Peter, Audrey might need you because she's having this issue or, hey, Peter, you're having this challenge. I think Audrey can help you solve that problem. You see, that's a guide. Did I solve Peter's problem? No. Did I solve Audrey's problem? No. I brought them together. And it's the same thing with our teams, you see, And I talk about this in the book. People hang on this word, this phrase that I use all the time, which is, I don't answer questions of my staff. And it's like, how in the world do you not answer questions? Because all we get is questions all day long. And I don't answer questions. I don't.

[00:14:46 - 00:14:46]
Okay?

[00:14:46 - 00:15:47]
Because my job is to guide them. And so if I did my job as the CEO effectively, I cast vision in whatever they're doing well enough that they really should not need to ask me a question. And if they do and it was answered, I just pointed back to what I. What. It was already there. Okay? Now, if they ask a question and I realize I did not communicate well, I'll fix that. But I don't answer their questions. Instead, they'll come and I'll say, okay, so, huh? Well, what about this? Or, well, if you did that, then what will happen? Huh? Well, did you talk to so and so about this? Interesting. And I don't answer their questions, you see, because Mr. Miyagi wax on, wax off. Why do I have to wax on, wax off all day, wax on, wax off. Then all of a sudden, you got in a fight, and you're automatically waxing, and you're like, oh, that's why I was waxing.

[00:15:47 - 00:15:54]
Makes sense. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And then we. Can you help us to see that internal move that we're actually making?

[00:15:54 - 00:15:55]
Yes.

[00:15:55 - 00:16:21]
So that's the human side of it. So let's talk about systems and tools and technology to really bring it. To bring it home. Sponsored by All Together Domains bringing your business online. Whether you are launching a new venture or leveling up your brand, All Together Domains.com helps you secure your digital real estate the smart way. Visit all together domains.com we cover this.

[00:16:21 - 00:17:36]
In the book and I'm doing an. Actually, when you get the book, there's going to be a bonus chapter that's only a few people are going to get. If you buy the book through the website, the delegationtrap.com There's a chapter in the book on how to use the method that we've created in human to human interaction. And then we talk about how to use it with AI. How to use it with AI. And the goal there is, there is a point in time coming real soon where we're going to be able to allow AI to watch us interact with another human and then AI is going to be able to mimic us with other humans. And so now when I need to delegate something, my AI will be able to do it. And it's again being a guide. It's not about telling. And that's what people get this wrong. People think, oh, so, so the AI is going to tell them what to do? No, the AI is going to understand what questions to ask. That is the thing that we are missing as business owners. We don't ask enough questions or the right question. And that's the second part.

[00:17:36 - 00:17:37]
Oh, sorry.

[00:17:37 - 00:18:00]
Okay. No, you're absolutely right. You're absolutely right. And so in the book there's an entire chapter and a half on question asking. We ask questions and we don't realize that the questions we have are going to get us the answers we want, which is never the answer we need. Why'd you do it that way? Not a good question to ask. Okay. Hey, can you explain your process to me exactly?

[00:18:00 - 00:18:11]
Yes. And it takes the edge. Yes, take the edge off. And I'm not feeling defensive, like trying to explain myself. You're pouncing on my intelligence and you know all that, that emotional stuff.

[00:18:11 - 00:19:19]
Yeah. So I'll give you, I'll give you an absolute hands down example of this. Okay. We run web classes where we, where I teach AI and we do them once a month. And so emails go out inviting people to the web classes and we like interaction. So one of the first emails is, hey, are you interested in learning about AI employees? If you are, respond with interested. And so we just want people to hit reply so we know who actually wants to be in a class. Right. And so we got all these people replying back, interested, interested, interested, interested, interested. Okay, cool. Well, I mentioned to you a little bit of the snafu I was having with Amazon earlier before we got on. Right. And so I was looking for an email from them and it hadn't come in. And so now I'm wondering, did my EA accidentally put it in the trash and think it was trash? And so I'm going through the trash. I know, I mean, I did a search. I'm just being paranoid at this point. Okay? But I'm just like, Amazon, where's my email? And so I'm going through the trash, and in the trash I'm seeing responses from people to the web class.

[00:19:19 - 00:19:20]
Oh my goodness.

[00:19:20 - 00:20:13]
And I'm like, why is this in the trash? What in the world is going on? Okay, Right. And you start doing a little freak out panic dance. Right? And so I immediately want to go to Slack and say, why the hell are these emails in the trash? Right, right. And so I. But instead I pause. And in fact, I actually did write that message and then deleted it and said, that's not a good way to ask that question, Atiba. And so then I did ask the question. I was looking in the trash and I noticed some of the web class emails in the trash. Could you tell me what your process is for working with the web class emails? And then she responds and she says, well, she said, yeah, that is true. They are in the trash. And it's because those people actually responded multiple times. It's a very valid reason.

[00:20:13 - 00:20:16]
That's the right. Yes, yes, it is.

[00:20:16 - 00:20:27]
Okay. And, and, and I said, thank you for explaining. And her response back to me was, thank you for caring about my process. And see, but what does that do for our relationship now?

[00:20:28 - 00:20:32]
It bonded a little bit more. It brought you closer and you have more trust and respect.

[00:20:33 - 00:21:16]
Right? And she was doing the right thing. Ask enough questions and we don't ask the right questions in the right way. And so we spent a lot of time in a book going through that and teaching you how to ask questions. So much so, so much so that we even have a bonus in, in the book on asking questions. It's an AI tool where you can come in and it's a situational coach and you can talk to it, it's conversational, and you can say, hey, my employee just deleted a bunch of emails that they shouldn't have. And I'm really frustrated because there's money in those emails that we're just throwing away. And I want to know why she did it and how do I approach this and what questions are. Because I Just want to say, what the hell is wrong with you?

[00:21:16 - 00:21:17]
Right, Exactly.

[00:21:17 - 00:22:30]
Can talk to this agent that we've built for you, and then it will respond back and tell you better questions to ask. So it really is. Once we look in that mirror and we see that we have been wearing the cape and we have the superhero complex, and. And we realize we need to sit in the guide seat. The biggest mindset shift coming full circle all the way back around is understanding what questions and how to ask them. How does the mindset shift? So, number one, thanks for being here with us all the way through. Appreciate you listening. And you can grab the book at  thedelegationtrap.com there you'll find the book. And plus a bunch of different bonuses. I mentioned one of them today. We have others as well. Like, for example, are you really a micromanager? Maybe you are. You want to help getting stop being. Realizing you're a micromanager and learning how not to be. Yeah. We've got a tool that will help you with that too. Plus a bunch more. Okay. And for everything, when you want to find me for everything, go to meet Atiba. Best way to find me.

[00:22:30 - 00:22:48]
Awesome. Well, thank you for that. And have all these things put up in the show notes for folks, for the. For the tech divination to plug in to what you're doing. So, Tiba, really appreciate you being here today. And if there's one nugget of truth that you want to drop on us, go ahead and do it right now.

[00:22:48 - 00:23:18]
The reality is this, y'all, you have to learn to ask better questions. In this age of AI that we're in and going into the world is changing, but what's not changing are the fundamental truths of leadership. And go study any great leader in history, any truly great leader in history, and you will see they asked more questions than they informed.

[00:23:18 - 00:23:27]
Well, we're going to leave it there. Tech divination. Atiba de Souza, thank you for dropping on us and really filling us up today. I really appreciate you brought a lot of value.

[00:23:27 - 00:23:29]
You're welcome. Thank you for having me again. Good to see you again.

[00:23:30 - 00:23:33]
Yes, absolutely. Yes. And I'm gonna have to plan a vacation.

[00:23:34 - 00:23:37]
Come on, let's go. Come hang out.

[00:23:38 - 00:23:50]
That's it for today's tech diva Biz talks. Hope you caught a gem or two. If you did, share it, review it, and most of all, put it into action. Until next time, tune in, level up, and talk tech.